In the news

Yesterday Blogger was down so I didn't get a chance to write about two "fat in the news" articles I read.


Article one was about how Chelsea Handler is fat bashing Kirstie Alley. It got my dander up, aren't we all adults? Must we be mean and petty and pick on one another? Is it really necessary to use her weight as the target when there are other things to say something about. *cough* scientology *cough *
I'm curious why Chelsea Handler feels Kirstie is a threat to her, enough so that she needs to make jabs at Kirstie? I get that as women we are catty and fucked up to one another on the age old basis of: other women = competition, but really this is stupid. 
I remember a few years ago cosmo or glamor magazine wrote some nasty tid bit about Kirstie Alley and her weight; in return I sent them and email scolding them for being play ground bullies vs. a fashion magazine for the brain dead masses. That aside I think it just goes to show how far the whole "size issue" really is the last form of acceptable discrimination. It's not just in everyday privet life, but in the mass media as well. Yes make a fat joke get a laugh, har har, GROW UP!


Second Story is the same thing only less celebrities (sort of), This is about yet another miss step by Southwest Airlines kicking someone fat off a flight, and publicly humiliating them to boot.. Tiggeman T.F.T.F. southwest. When will this airline do the right thing and teach their gate staff not to be total dicks?! This poor woman and her mother were made to feel less than human. It is beyond wrong what southwest did, and how they handled the situation makes me want to puke.
The Article sites Director Kevin Smith's similar issue that happened last year (there is your celebrity connection) Who coined the phrase 'Tf Tf' in his later Smod cast on the issue. You would think that after all the negative press southwest keeps getting over this, they would learn that the media eats these stories up. Being that I travel a whole lot I am always scared that I too will get kicked off a flight for my chubby butt. I am lucky though most of the time it has never been an issue. 


However once when I was flying to L.A. I had a man sitting next to me whom treated me like I had the plague due to my size (odd as I was only about a size 20 back when this happened). I had taken my assigned seat, put my head phones on but didn't have my CD player on yet, had my book open on my lap and was starting to read; this man walks up looks at me makes an exasperated sigh then sits down to let other passengers by to take their seats.(Now i fit perfectly in my seat no problem with room to spare) I'm going to guess he figured I had music playing and couldn't hear him, because soon as a flight attendant walked near us he flagged her down and asked to be reseated, "I don't want to sit next to someone who might encroach on my space, can you find me a different seat?" The flight attendant glanced at me, shrugged he shoulders and said that they were about to push back so he would have to wait. He seemed flustered but nodded at her. After a few moments the last of the passengers were on the plane, the captain came over the speaker system saying because the flight wasn't very full that we had a weight balance issue, so if people would like to find other seats further back in the plane please do so now to we can take off with better weight distribution. I have never seen anyone get up and move away from me so fast in my life! The man for up and almost sprinted away from me. Clearly this had a lasting impression, lucky for me I'm not sure many people over heard the conversation. Despite that it hurt me anyway.


All I can say to both of these stories is if you a bigger person: Do not let others police your body. Do not simply let people think it is okay to treat you badly based on nothing more than your size. Bullies come in all shapes, sizes and ages. Being big does not mean you don't have the same rights as everyone else! Stand up for your self and your dignity when faced with bad treatment, no matter the situation. And if all else fails talk about it with the right people, and you can show the world what assholes the people who treat you like crap really are.


Fight!!
Raven

Happy International No Diet Day!

Ahh yes lets all celebrate not buying in to the whole diet horror!

For those of my readers who might not ever been on a diet, lucky you! And now to the rest of us who have suffered through, bad food, hunger, and all the nasty yo yo weight fluctuations; a hearty WOO HOO!

I have a firm belief that diets are the worst things you can do to your body. Hunger is not the key to being healthy nor to loosing weight.

The diet industry is just that in industry, it is a faceless monster, money hungry before all else.. Sadly it's one that really kills people.
I don't know the exact numbers of people who have died to be thin but the numbers are too large for my comfort. The Idea of being able to not just restrict what you eat and exercise, but pop a pill and be loose weight is a lie. One that too many people rush off to do. A last ditch effort to conform to what society says you need to look like. Oh and not all of those magic pills haven't been tested to work or be safe.

Then there is the medical 'weight loss miracle' of lap band and gastric bypass. More lies and deaths. Now while These things do work for some people and have improved the quality of life for some; it isn't the cure it all for the mass overweight population. You might not see as much coverage of the people who have been failed by these things, but they are out there. Suffering more now than when they were simply just fat. Worse for wear after putting their bodies through a large medical procedure, and then the subsequent mental distress of not only a failed surgery but the way their medical professionals treat them. Told over and over again it must be something they are doing to make this procedure fail. Wrong on sooo many levels.

The Fact of the matter is not just the overweight are dying to be thin. There is a whole community of people who are already at a healthy weight who want to loose weight too. On the polar extreme of overweight you have people who believe its not enough to be 'skinny', these poor people believe that  being anorexic and bulimic are the answer. Huge communities of mostly young girls hating themselves and truly starving themselves to fit in and be smaller. Again the whole stigma of what it means to be fat scaring people in to starvation.

So today I celebrate not only not buying in to the whole diet lie, but how much I love my own body that I don't want or need these things to be a complete, or valuable person.

I'm gonna go sew a dress and be happy with who I am.

I vow never to let society tell me how I should look, that I am not worthy of things just because of my size, I refuse to let doctors treat me like an inferior person because they can't look past my BMI, I will not let men or women's judgements of me stop me from living and loving others, I will also look people in the eye when they bully me or others due to our size and tell them they are not only rude but closed minded bigots. But most of all I vow to never self hate.

Feel good about yourself and what you do with your body. don't let someone else tell you what is right for you, or how you need to be!

Love and kisses,
Raven

Thrifting.. the clothing gold mine.

Well my dears it is a fact that i'm a cheap bitch, And proud of it. My mom taught me to be a bargain shopper at a young age. It has done me a great service over the years.


I don't like spending a lot of my hard earned dollars on shitty, ugly, badly made clothes, that seem to be in abundance for us fats. So my fun alternative is thrifting. Yes my local savers, thrift town, salvation army, goodwill, along with a slew of other places are all my playground for fun and interesting clothes.


I look at it like this.. I'd rather spend 5 dollars on something that I can get a few wears out of, than say $60 on something that might only survive one wear *cough* new torrid *cough*.


I also love that there are so many good places to find stuff online. If you don't know about fatshionxchange or the curvy_exchange over on Live journal where have you been for the last few years?? In to steam punk? yeah there is a plus size steampunk community too.


Did you know that there is a cool place called goth auctions? they have a whole plus size section! and if your religious about checking it you can find some killer stuff. Vintage torrid polka dot dress for $12 anyone?? yeah thought so.


The goodwill  has an online auction site full of clothes, accessories, shoes, along with house stuff, and even some great jewelry.


Other online resources are within bigger chat and forum communities. I know that if you belong to a fetish community website that has groups for say; bbws and their admirers, or fabulous curvy chicks, you can find may a curvy lady trying to part out her wardrobe.


Of corse the classic standby being ebay. If you a fat chick and never shopped on ebay you don't know what your missing. and i'll just guess you might be amish. That explains why you haven't been, what with the no internets.


The new big thing is local clothing swaps for the big girls. One just happened in san francisco, I hear it was a smash success. Sadly I didn't make to the event but damn if i didn't want to. Who doesn't want to get free clothes, meet cool people and eat cupcakes? I know I DO!


All I can say is talk to other people who are wearing amazing clothes. Who doesn't love a random compliment from a stranger? "Oh wow! I love your Dress! where did you get it?!?" then you start a conversation about clothes, where you shop and share information. 
I share with you, you share with me. since I am a firm believer in spreading the clothing/fashion wealth! 


And that is my parting of some wisdom on the used fatshion front.


Me and my awesome thrifted dress are going to go mail off some of my used clothes to other lovely ladies.


Kisses bitches!
Raven

And we're off..

Hey there,
So for my first post I'm going to give you a peek at me. With  this peek I hope you'll grow to enjoy my humor (read snark and sarcasm), and come back for more.

I'm short at 5 feet four inches tall. now that might not sound short to you but throw about 250+ pounds on that frame and you have a short fat chick, who wears glasses and swears like a sailor. I'm heavily tattooed, and starting to get piercings, after many years of rejecting the thought of them.

So there you have it I'm short and fat. Oh and don't fit in to the mold of trying to hide the fact that I'm fat. I am  comfortable in my own skin 95% of the time, and that other 5% is reserved for when I'm sleeping or dealing with the mass populations negative outlook on fat girls.

Before I go off in that direction, I love music, and I prefer it live, loud and preferably over multiple nights. I drink, smoke, swear (mentioned that above),  am in general a bad influence on adolescents both boy and girls. Despite all that I like dogs (especially mine), some cats, I love my adopted goldfish, I bake yummy things, I sew fairly well, I take photos of almost everything, I travel a lot, and have a fairly entertaining outlook on life, and I speak my mind.

I shop a lot for fun cool stylish clothes, and as a fat girl trying to do this, that is an adventure. I'll share with you where I go, what I found, and how you can get it, or make it on the cheap.  After all if you want to look good you have to work for it! added bonus I have a style as eclectic as my music tastes, so odds are something I wear will work for someone else.

I'm going to wrap this up my saying the grammar and spelling police can kiss my ass. I try to keep spelling errors to a minimum. However if you have nothing better to do that correct my syntax and grammar, you need to go get a life and have a stiff drink and or a smoke. While sipping your adult beverage/ having a relaxing smoke,  you should then ponder what a giant asshole you were/are, then take a deep breath and relax, you're taking life to seriously!  that my friend will kill you faster than anything.

Hope to see you all again soon!
Raven