A few of my favorite things.

Any Time I am down in the dumps, there are a few sure fire things that make me happy. Some are better for me than others, but really it all comes down to self medication. we all do it don't judge!

I have a weakness and almost unnatural love of coffee. From the way it smells while still in bean form, the different smell when it is steeping in hot water in my french press, to the amazing taste. Oh and the varieties of kinds and awesome local roasters here in the bay... I swoon!
And I'll freely admit I'm a coffee snob. I like mine brewed in a french press. I refuse to use a standard coffee pot with filters, they tend to strip all the tasty natural oils from the bean leaving it bitter and nasty tasting. I dislike "flavored coffee" that tastes of say french vanilla for example, its wrong not to taste they amazing coffee flavor. I tend to blend my coffee with fresh spices (clove, cinnamon, nutmeg), to give it that extra yummy taste. I enhance the taste; not try to disguise the coffees natural flavor. I want to taste the caffeine damn it! To properly serve my dark dreamy beverage of choice I take half & half with some brown sugar. Let me tell you any one who uses that flavored creamer shit is a fucking idiot, and they SHOULD be stopped.

second way to self medicate, I bake. And no I don't mean I get high (I'm not opposed to pot use, I just don't partake). I make cookies, cake/cupcakes, and now pies. more specifically I have two pies that I adore making. One being apple pie. now you might think apple pie.. isn't that like one of the essayist pies to make? Yes, anyone can make an apple pie, and no its not difficult. However there are some small things that can make or break an apple pie. Namely you need to know your audience, whom are you serving the pie to? do they like things more tart or do they like it more sweet? crunchy vs. more squishy.. All important factors in a good apple pie. And then there is the spice factor, you need to consider what time of year you are serving said pie. if its winter you want the spices to be darker, to make the pie have a more earthy taste much like hot cider. in spring and summer you want to have a more sweet crisp taste more butter than cinnamon. The type of apple you use also should be thought about, since all the types of apple can give you flavor and texture. try to mix it up.
Second pie I have learned to love making is a classic pecan pie. This pie is an amazing piece of work, not to mention a finicky bitch! Too hot of an oven will over cook it making it tough. If too cool and it wont gel properly when it cools, leaving you a runny yet tasty mess. Say nothing Of the dozens of recipes out there that have some interesting variations. Personally I soak the pecans in dark rum for up to a day before I add them to the top of the pie to bake. Then I add some of the rum to the pie filling. I find that even a small amount of rum adds a pleasant spice taste to the pie, without taking away or distracting from the other flavor. But again the pie it temperamental. I do Like that over the years people have learned to put a spin on the type of pie. There are honey pecan pies that don't use any kuro syrup. Also Pies that use maple syrup, brown sugar, dark brown sugar and a variety of small changes that truly make each pie taste slightly different. I personally never thought I would be a pecan pie fan, but here I am with one sitting in my fridge cooling.

Outside of the kitchen I really like to read. I devour books, as my family can attest to For a while before I started collecting my books used and on the cheep I had a $10 a bad book habit. I am a fast reader I can easily read a 500 page book in a day, Example: I read the entire Harry Potter series, all the books one after another in five days (I read two in one day). I don't always read easy fluff books either.
But I am very much a pleasure reader. I've had more best friends in books than in real life. My reading habit comes from not having a lot of friends, there is no other way to look at it. I read books to have company when I'm lonely, to cheer me up when I'm sad, and to escape to somewhere different when I need a break. I was lucky that my family read to me when I was little. Even now I like being read to, I buy audio books once and a while just to have that nice familiar experience of being read to aloud.
 I did have some trouble back when I was learning to read, so my Gram got me that horrible 'hooked on phonic' program, and while it was silly and ridiculous I have to admit it worked. Once I could read on my own I never looked back. Who needed movies, when there were far more books. My mind works like a movie anyway, when I read my brain will play a movie in my head for me. So I'm addicted to reading as well.

 And as we all know I like to shop. But specifically I get great pleasure out of bargain hunting. And thrift stores are my version of a good time. I like paying $2 for a dress. especially cause I can't even buy enough fabric to make a dress for me for that small sum of money. And really it is about the experience of finding something that another person passed on and giving it a new life.

Once my new bike seat gets here I have a feeling that is also going to be a new favorite activity.
I tend to be a big swimmer, especially when I'm angry. there is nothing like a miles worth of laps to make you calm down. I'm sure it had to do with the steady rhythm of movements and breathing that helps mellow me. I like the feeling of pulling myself through the water, my whole body working together. I sometimes forget how much I love to swim, until I get to a pool them it all comes back and I start to miss the water.

All of them seem to be symbolic of something about me, but i'm going to try not to over analyze myself on this. Anyway I have a BBQ to take my fabulous pecan pie to, you know you want some *wink*

Kisses
Raven

The seat dilemma.

For a few years now I have had a spiffy red "beach cruiser" bike. It's all  retro and awesome with coaster breaks. But when I got the bike, I was too short to ride it with out feeling like i'd fall over when I stopped.  Plus the saddle a.k.a. seat, was super uncomfortable. Then I got distracted and didn't think about my bike for a long time. It hung in my parents garage while I went zooming around in my jeep, and lived my life.

Plus I didn't feel like being a fat girl on a bike in public.. I was young and didn't love my body yet. I had horrific visions of being a bear on a bicycle, or my seat making my butt look funny and getting made fun of. I abandon the whole bike Idea for a long time. By chance one day I saw a larger lady out on her bike when I  was driving through San Francisco; I was taken with how happy she looked, and how amazing her legs were. Sadly I was still to uncomfortable to get on my own bike.

Then I got older and more happy with me and my weird body. I started to miss my bike. I really do miss the feeling of taking a nice relaxing ride, added bonus of it's faster than walking.
 For my birthday this April, when my sweet mom asked what i'd like for my birthday I responded " a new bike seat! A big squishy one, so I can ride and my butt wont hurt."  HAHAHA bad idea!
I did get a new seat and promptly had my dad put it on my bike and went for a test ride. I honestly still feel too short for the bike, but the real issue is the damn seat! talk about uncomfortable. I didn't even make it around the block before I decided the seat was wrong my my chunky butt.
I feel bad that I had to reject the seat my mom picked out, She told me she looked online to find it, her search was based on gel squish and size. Size wise the seat was good, however it just felt too darn stiff. If there was gel in that saddle it sure didn't do my butt any good, But I really want to ride my bike.

So now what am I to do? I ran off to the internets and googlesed it.. I remember some of my favorite bike seats over the years had little to no padding, and were leather. I took that info to the magic land of googles, low and behold I find the king of all leather bike saddle makers, Brooks. What beautiful saddles.. but OMG you want like $100 for a damn seat.. this thing better be worth it. I mulled over it for a while, did a crap load of research and comparisons between several of there pieces of leather fun.. and today I finally purchased it; a went with a B68S. lovely wide, and made for the ladies! which from what I can tell just means its shorter, since I too am short I should work nice.

It was interesting doing my bike research that it seems a lot of people have bike saddle issues, and in the same breath fat folks have a very difficult time with it. Bike companies make seats in all shapes and sizes now, but unless your a hard core bicycle person it is super hard to tell heads or tails of what kind of saddle you need. Prices have a crazy range in prices as well from $20 - $300.. And I thought buying vintage clothes were expensive!

I hope I have been lucky enough to find a good saddle for me. I have a feeling if this saddle is comfortable, it will be worth every penny. I can sense I will be doing a lot more outside bike adventures... now if I only didn't live on a hill.

Kisses!
Raven

I'm an addict

Hi my name is Raven, And I'm addicted to vintage clothes. 


Yesterday I mentioned that I'm a cheap bitch when it comes to buying clothes. I should clarify this statement, or put a foot note on it. "I am a cheap bitch when it comes to clothes; accept when it's vintage clothes".  I have a very large weak spot when it come to all things vintage. be it house wears, accessories,  my glasses frames, shoes, cars, music... but especially... dresses. *swoons*


There is just something about the vintage shape of clothing, it really does flatter the form of the curvy. And do you know why? I mentioned it in my fatshion rant; Structure! The way the clothes were cut, and then fit to a body were built in such a way that it accentuated that good parts, and ignores the parts you'd rather ignore. 


SO this being what every fat chick likes but can't find in todays clothing hell, I tend to shop.. and spend waaay to much money on vintage dresses. And really buying vintage stuff in the bigger sizes.. isn't cheap. worth it... but expensive as far as addictions go.


I have a small but amazing collection of dresses I adore! but I also go the extra mile and snap up vintage patterns to sew my own clothing. I'm lucky that my grandmother taught me to sew, and read patterns. she was an amazing seamstress. The woman looked like Sophia Loren back in the day. she was one hot bitch! (i'm willing to overlook her being the poster child for eating disorders, before such things even had a name... but I digress). My Gram knew how to rock a hand made dress and she lovingly helped fat little Raven over the years with making many a costume, and dress.





I have also learned a few tricks for the vintage look on a dime. Easy fix for something shapeless and down right ugly.. like this awful yellow house coat/dress/possible tent I own.. the thing is super shapeless but vintage,  has a metal zipper, has cute pockets! and I payed maybe $10 for it. I can see there is potential, just need to figure out what it needs, other than a to be burned for being so fugly. 


*Side note* The best look on a curvy frame unless you looked like Marilyn was, for late 40's through the early 60's was the shirt waist dress. simple classic clean look. structured top, and a nice full bottom. in a bevy of colors, patterns, sleeve styles, and embellishments. good for work and play!


Now how do I transform said sack of yellow tent into something that shows my curves like the dress mentioned above? And without getting out my sewing machine; since I want to be out the door in 5 minutes? Simple and easy, with every girls favorite accessory! A simple stretchy belt worn on the high waist almost at the under bust. < This simple fix for something that fits too big and has no shape will then create a shape by hugging the body at what should be its smallest point, drawing attention to the bust area then flowing out to the full bell of the dresses skirt. I call it the instant hourglass effect. 


For a more permeant fix I can simply dart the dress in a few key locations to give it the same structure and effect. The stretchy belt is a damn good fix all on its own. Especially for those of you who don't sew (like my sister, who wouldn't know how to turn the damn machine on to save her life).


So my addiction to vintage, is also a lesson on what fits your body. Even the illusion of structure in clothing makes frumpy look fantastic. I highly suggest everyone own at least one belt that can be used for such emergency measures. I also suggest that every curvy girl learn what flatters her body. find one really nice vintage thing, give it a loving home and let the structure in that stuff speak for its self. what you pay for a fantastic vintage piece of clothing will be worth every penny.


Alternatively you can lean to sew! Even make nice with other chicks who are crafty bitches. Heck you can even find people on etsy willing to sew you something that will fit your body.


Don't be afraid to get something ugly on the cheap either! If it fits and you like something about it; alter it and accessorize till you like what you see.


Kisses!
Raven

Thrifting.. the clothing gold mine.

Well my dears it is a fact that i'm a cheap bitch, And proud of it. My mom taught me to be a bargain shopper at a young age. It has done me a great service over the years.


I don't like spending a lot of my hard earned dollars on shitty, ugly, badly made clothes, that seem to be in abundance for us fats. So my fun alternative is thrifting. Yes my local savers, thrift town, salvation army, goodwill, along with a slew of other places are all my playground for fun and interesting clothes.


I look at it like this.. I'd rather spend 5 dollars on something that I can get a few wears out of, than say $60 on something that might only survive one wear *cough* new torrid *cough*.


I also love that there are so many good places to find stuff online. If you don't know about fatshionxchange or the curvy_exchange over on Live journal where have you been for the last few years?? In to steam punk? yeah there is a plus size steampunk community too.


Did you know that there is a cool place called goth auctions? they have a whole plus size section! and if your religious about checking it you can find some killer stuff. Vintage torrid polka dot dress for $12 anyone?? yeah thought so.


The goodwill  has an online auction site full of clothes, accessories, shoes, along with house stuff, and even some great jewelry.


Other online resources are within bigger chat and forum communities. I know that if you belong to a fetish community website that has groups for say; bbws and their admirers, or fabulous curvy chicks, you can find may a curvy lady trying to part out her wardrobe.


Of corse the classic standby being ebay. If you a fat chick and never shopped on ebay you don't know what your missing. and i'll just guess you might be amish. That explains why you haven't been, what with the no internets.


The new big thing is local clothing swaps for the big girls. One just happened in san francisco, I hear it was a smash success. Sadly I didn't make to the event but damn if i didn't want to. Who doesn't want to get free clothes, meet cool people and eat cupcakes? I know I DO!


All I can say is talk to other people who are wearing amazing clothes. Who doesn't love a random compliment from a stranger? "Oh wow! I love your Dress! where did you get it?!?" then you start a conversation about clothes, where you shop and share information. 
I share with you, you share with me. since I am a firm believer in spreading the clothing/fashion wealth! 


And that is my parting of some wisdom on the used fatshion front.


Me and my awesome thrifted dress are going to go mail off some of my used clothes to other lovely ladies.


Kisses bitches!
Raven

a rant on fatshion.

Why oh why must cute clothes not have proper fit for a plus size?
when I say fit i don't mean it in a size sense so much as a fit as in tailoring.
I am beyond sick of buying clothes that have no real fit nor flair to flatter my curves. even regular women's clothes seem to have strayed from a more fit look. and i've got to say off the rack clothes are down right frumpy looking. Structure is important!!

I am a fortunate soul who loves to sew and is somewhat good at it. However I have a very difficult time spending upwards of $70 on a dress(not to mention the $50 for a top.. a top that has less than 2 yards of fabric), that I then have to alter the shit out of to make it cute for my body. or worse have to add to it to make it a fashion do, rather than a fashion "OMG you look like crap, don't you own a mirror?!?".

add to that the fact that the fashion industry not only hates fat chicks.. it also feels the need to gouge prices.. or make things in god awful prints...or ewww poly knit.. or any sort of knit fabric that clings un-lovingly to bits that need not have things clung to it.. 
while we are on the fabric content thing, whatever happened to good old cotton? or even natural based fabrics, you know the stuff that breathes, and can keep you warm and cool??? (not that I don't love my vinyl and once and a while latex.. but not everyday.)
and can you say shoddy fabric offerings??? and bad construction. I ordered a dress from B&lu.com and literally wore it for 10 minutes and the damn strap broke!! I wasn't even doing anything other than standing in the laundry room talking to my friend as he moved his clothes from the washer and the dryer. If you ask me that constitutes bad construction and poor fabrics. 

I put major effort into looking cute and finding clothes that work for me, i'd dig a little help when it comes to options. I also feel that the mass public of chubby chicks who might not have the ability to do the same as me should have a little help. since how can anyone expect us to look good when there is sooo much bad fashion out there marketed to us?

Oh and fashion industry incase your reading, just because my ass is semi-big doesn't mean i'm tall!! If i have to hem another pair of pants due to them getting longer as they get big, I might just sew my finger together. Oh and my legs didn't get bigger as the pants got larger either. no one should have to take off 6 inches ( i wish i was kidding) of pant leg to make it look like i have legs and a cute butt in the pants.

Oh and all that cool alternative clothing that is out there, START MAKING BIGGER SIZES!!! at minimum sell patterns so us crafty bitches can sew something awesome too! 


And at this juncture i'd like to extend a hearty FUCK YOU to torrid who once (a long time ago) had fun, funky clothes that were well made, comfortable, unique and awesome, what the fuck happened??? what happened to quality, value, and variety of styles? Where did the rockabilly, punk, club/rave wear go??? You do know we aren't all pink loving divas out here ( i like to think the bbw kink community is all nodding in semi agreement).
Want to see two fat girls of a similar size get in to a fight? drop a peice of vintage torrid wear in between them and watch how they go at it. Hell do it the easy way and watch an ebay auction over that shit. Yeah we are brutal when it comes to that shit.

Earth to torrid.. psst .. *whispers* come here i wanna tell you something... You were doing something right. Why oh why go tell your customers to fuck off and wear horrible clothes that make you look like everyone else... when clearly some of us like that we aren't cookie cutter chicks? Aren't there enough places that make plus size crap that is "normal"? wasn't your niche for the alternative set?? hmm I think it was. (yeah i'm still bitter about this). Diva style my ass.


kisses!
Raven

And we're off..

Hey there,
So for my first post I'm going to give you a peek at me. With  this peek I hope you'll grow to enjoy my humor (read snark and sarcasm), and come back for more.

I'm short at 5 feet four inches tall. now that might not sound short to you but throw about 250+ pounds on that frame and you have a short fat chick, who wears glasses and swears like a sailor. I'm heavily tattooed, and starting to get piercings, after many years of rejecting the thought of them.

So there you have it I'm short and fat. Oh and don't fit in to the mold of trying to hide the fact that I'm fat. I am  comfortable in my own skin 95% of the time, and that other 5% is reserved for when I'm sleeping or dealing with the mass populations negative outlook on fat girls.

Before I go off in that direction, I love music, and I prefer it live, loud and preferably over multiple nights. I drink, smoke, swear (mentioned that above),  am in general a bad influence on adolescents both boy and girls. Despite all that I like dogs (especially mine), some cats, I love my adopted goldfish, I bake yummy things, I sew fairly well, I take photos of almost everything, I travel a lot, and have a fairly entertaining outlook on life, and I speak my mind.

I shop a lot for fun cool stylish clothes, and as a fat girl trying to do this, that is an adventure. I'll share with you where I go, what I found, and how you can get it, or make it on the cheap.  After all if you want to look good you have to work for it! added bonus I have a style as eclectic as my music tastes, so odds are something I wear will work for someone else.

I'm going to wrap this up my saying the grammar and spelling police can kiss my ass. I try to keep spelling errors to a minimum. However if you have nothing better to do that correct my syntax and grammar, you need to go get a life and have a stiff drink and or a smoke. While sipping your adult beverage/ having a relaxing smoke,  you should then ponder what a giant asshole you were/are, then take a deep breath and relax, you're taking life to seriously!  that my friend will kill you faster than anything.

Hope to see you all again soon!
Raven